


Patience

by tinycrown



Category: Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: Cause Ryder said he knew Ez as a lil blooberry, Crying, Ezra loves his grandpa, Ezra's just a big mess, Fluff, Frustration, Gen, Him and Rex would make a good grandpa-squad, His rant is like Hatoko-kun's breakdown in When Supernatural Battles Became Commonplace, Hurt/Comfort, I flipped and just liek 'BRUUH', I'm actually loving Ezra and Ryder, Insecurity, It's called "I don't understand" not the entire rant itself but her tone, Ryder is a good grandpa, Yes Ryder is a grandpa, breakdown - Freeform, enjoy this shit, enjoy this shit 2, ok ill stop, yeaah
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-05
Updated: 2016-12-05
Packaged: 2018-09-06 15:35:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8758762
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tinycrown/pseuds/tinycrown
Summary: Even with friends standing by him, Ezra can't help feeling alone.  Ryder comforts Ezra after the events of "An Inside Man".





	

Ezra knows that death is a part of the Rebel Fleet’s contract. And that didn’t make it hurt any less than it already did. But the fear that rolled off of Morad when he tested the sabotaged speeder suffocated Ezra, made him angry and terrified for his friend’s life. The force flowed and strangled Ezra and he so desperately wanted to get up and push everyone out of the way in a four mile radius, rush to Morad and rip him off that speeder like a bacta patch to a blaster wound. 

 

But… the act itself  _ terrified  _ Ezra so badly he felt as if he was going to faint. He… Morad just combusted into thin air. No remains, just… flakes of fire melting to the ground while Ezra’s head cleared, the force less of a concussion and more a mild headache than anything. But Ezra held his tears, kept his chin high with a small scowl on his face as the shade of the worker’s helmet hid his captivating eyes that held the emotion of such vacillation that he couldn’t look at anyone. 

 

Temptation to kill Admiral Thrawn right then and there was strong, but remembering Kanan’s words were harder. And it hurt to think, his ears vibrated with the sounds of the overheated engine and the explosion. He winced, his hands trembling, shaking as he took deep breaths to calm his racing heart and spasming muscles. But now, with the calm of the wind whistling in his ears, Ezra realizes he’s fighting to hard to hold back tears to mourn one of his closest friends and he realizes, that he is allowed to be sad.  _ But I’ll be so weak...I don’t want to become weak.  _

 

“Ezra.” A gruff voice brings him to reality, a hand on his kneecap as Ryder kneels in front of him with his lips pulled into a thin line and his eyes holding something close to a pained glance as they stare somewhat kindled to Ezra’s. “Ezra it’s not your fault.” he says quietly, 

 

“I don’t understand.” His voice is shaky as he inhales a breath, and Ryder perks, ducking his head to catch the downcast gaze that suddenly looks away. “I don’t understand why they think it’s amusing to get their point across by  _ killing  _ people.” He shivers, his hands shaking again as he clutches dangerously at his own arms, leaving bruises on the tanned skin underneath with many scars owned and earned for his years punishable on the streets, the very place he grew wanted in the disgusting alleys of Capital City. 

 

“I don’t get why they think it will make their point stronger by killing their opposers rather than just… I don’t know…  _ firing  _ them? I don’t know! I just…” He sucks in a breath, ignoring the urge to punch the nearest rock, break or shatter the fragile bones in his littered hands. “For their own agenda… they oppress their workers and citizens with  _ fear _ and threats of murder and I  _ don’t understand.  _ Ryder please help me understand why they  _ do that _ to good people.” Ezra begged, facing the man with glazed eyes. 

 

“I can’t tell you why, Ezra. The Empire, the people in the Empire are horrible people, and force knows Marida will miss Morad. But you know death, I know death, we can help her, I can help her, and you can help her get through it. You just have to understand that what you’re fighting for, is for the good. You are fighting on the lighter side of the force, and I know with much work you will be the greatest jedi.” He says, cupping Ezra’s cheeks and making the teenager face him.

 

“It’s okay to cry. You’re allowed to feel sadness, Ezra.” Fat drops of salty water flow slowly down his face as he throws himself to the older man, wrapping his arms around his neck as his feet rub together forcefully. Quiet, choked sobs escape his throat with strangled cries as Ryder wraps his arms around his back from the uncomfortable position he’s sitting in.  _ It’s okay, child.  _ Ryder sighs, closing his eyes and rubbing Ezra’s back. Fingers working down his spine to relieve thick tension built up over weeks of stress. 

 

The grip around his neck tightens and Ryder presses his cold nose against the temple of the teen crushing him, with reassuring whispers and hopeful smiles Ezra can’t see. He spots Kanan six meters away, and nods at the young adult, even though he could not see, Kanan nodded back. 

 

Ezra’s sobs die down as he feels the presence of his mentor, drying his eyes with the palm of his hands and swallowing down shudders of wails. “Hey, kid.” Kanan says softly, pulling him up. Ezra sighs, yawning from the emotional excretion of the day and plopping his head onto Kanan’s shoulder. “How far is Hera from the rendezvous point?” He asks quietly. 

 

“She’ll be here in ten minutes. Say your goodbyes now, it might be awhile before we see them again.” Ezra nods and heads off to find Jho and Marida, hugging himself with a grimace. 

 

Ryder watches quietly as Ezra walks up to Marida and hugs the woman, reassuring her with mumbled words he can’t hear as she nods, and smiles with tears in her eyes as brown hairs frame her weary face. Jho puts a hand on his shoulder and nods, somewhat of a proud smile in his voice-like translator. 

 

“He’s grown.” Ryder comments, crossing his arms and leaning against the tan rocks that hid their base. Kanan sighs. “Sometimes I wish I could see how much he has grown. But I’m lucky to be alive at all.”

 

“I’m worried about him. He seems…  _ off _ .”

 

“Yes, through the force as well. He doesn’t open up as much anymore.” 

 

“I can’t imagine.” Ryder silences himself quickly as the loud hum of the  _ Ghost’s _ engine interrupts the conversation and Ezra returns to Kanan’s side. His gaze is held to the ground, his posture forced as if he is  _ banning _ himself from looking at other people. 

 

“Come on, boys. Time to debrief!” Hera calls, smiling at their return. Ezra starts to walk, but stops and turns around, running into Ryder and hugging him tightly, wrapping his arms around his neck on his tiptoes, whispering  “Thankyou” into his ears as he disappears, already turning and walking back onto the  _ Ghost _ quickly. 

 

Zeb nods to him with a straight face and the ramp closes, leaving him to shield his eyes from the dust as the ship lifts off and up into the atmosphere of Lothal.

 

_ He’s grown, hasn’t he?  _

  
He can almost see Mira and Ephraim's proud smiles. 


End file.
